The Failed Romance Story

Heeey people who read my stuff! Sorry I haven't written in a while...but I hope this kinda somewhat makes up for it. - from future author

“ ‘Hey, you love me right?” She asked burrowing her head onto her boyfriend’s shoulder half paying attention to the television that showed two shows at the same time so they wouldn’t bicker about who gets to watch and who has to miss his/her show. The boyfriend looked briefly down at his purring girlfriend and smirked.

‘Nope. Not at all,’ he said kicking his feet up onto the coffee table shaking their ‘his and her’ mugs and resting his arms on the back of his head. She shot her head up and frowned.

‘What do you mean? What the hell do you mean?’ She demanded; she started to blink ferociously.

‘I’m sorry but love? Seriously?’ He asked tilting his head then crossing his arms looking very amused.

‘You know what? Just forget it!’ She swished her whole body around so that she would face the arm of the couch and scooted herself to the other half of the couch.

‘Love is too weak of a word. I’m completely obsessed. I’m done for because I’ve been done.’ She turned around to get a better look at him. ‘You’ve ruined me; absolutely ruined me. Again I apologize, but no I don’t love you. You broke me too much for me to say that. No, it’s not love because it’s something more compelling, more unattainable, more inevitable, more seductive, more… more everything. Look, I can’t just simply say I love you to confirm with you because you feel insecure about what I’m thinking whenever I’m around you.’ She starts to look at him incredulously; her mouth forming a perfect ‘O’ the size of a quarter. He laughed at her incredible face and playfully tapped her nose. Then said, “Because I have to say something better than ‘I Love You’ so that you never ever ever doubt me again and also I know that you need… wait no deserve much better than something I can say and have said to anyone.’

‘That was quite a speech. No seriously, I’ll clap to that mister. Really poetic!’ She jokingly said as she lauded him. He glared at her sarcasm.

‘But you made one mistake.’ She informed him.

‘Oh yeah? What was that?’

‘How on earth could you think?’

‘Excuse me?’

‘You said ‘I can’t simply say I love you or confirm with you because you feel insecure about what I’m thinking whenever I’m around you’ And so ask, how on earth, Mister, can you even have one lucid thought if you’re around such an amazing astoundingly beautiful woman such as me?’

‘Oh yeah. I forgot about that line!’ He half smiled and raised an eyebrow. She giggled and shadowed his lopsided grin. Teasingly, he pushed her head back on to the couch with his knuckles. She let out a bit of a girlish squeal as he tickled and wrestled her. He holds her chin with thumb and index finger.

‘Geez, and here I was trying to be romantic.’ He sighed pitifully. He took a glimpse down at her and she took a peek at him, but those stares ended up being much longer than they expected. Then the magic of infatuation overwhelms them; their pupils start dilating, their pulses quicken, their breathing becomes abnormal, their tongues become tied, their heads are cleared losing their train of thought and sense of time, their stomach starts to be rampaged by a parade of butterflies. His eyes were on hers and hers were on his. Their gazes towards each other would make anyone want to either blush and look away or yell ‘Get a room!’.

‘You know there was an easy yet infallible way to be romantic?’ She said wondrously as if she were surprised she was able to speak at all.

‘Really? And how could that be done?’ He said brusquely.

‘Like this,’ She declared as she leaned in closer towards him. Her eyes narrowed down onto his lips and he couldn’t help but look at hers that were lusciously glossed and smelled of a field strawberries. He readied himself for their contact by closing his eyes and bending down, when all of a sudden she left the couch and headed out of the room to the kitchen. Disappointed, he was about to protest, until she brought back a box.

‘Share with me?’ She asked as she opened the box and brought out a container of heart shaped cookies that were half colored red and half colored white.  He smiled warmly at her.

‘The best kind of love declaration there is,’ He stated breaking a cookie straight down the middle. He handed half of the cookie to her and ‘clinked’ their cookies as they would with glasses of champagne. They ate and chuckled till the very end.”

“So what do you think?” The nervous author asks as the agitated director looks up from the paper.

“What do I think? WHAT DO I THINK ABOUT THIS PIECE OF USELESS GARBAGE?” The director decries as he slams the paper down onto his desk. The author grimaces as the director’s spittle landed on her arm.

“Do you think you’re writing a freaking soap opera or some Korean drama or something? No! You’re supposed to write a scenario and magazine special to advertise the company’s new couple line that includes a dual splitting television screen, specialty mugs, a couple couch, and their romance deserts!”

“Which I included,” the author protests.

“You did it in the most cliché and unfashionable way possible! Rewrite it and bring it back to me by 5 a.m. tomorrow. It better be good or else you’ll be cut from this job. Get to work and out of my face!” The director sat up from his chair and swished out of the author’s office. The author dejectedly opens her Mac laptop, deletes the failed work, and begins to rethink her ideas.